For years I’ve marveled at the dripping decline in American culture, convinced that some deprivation of intellect or philosophy, morality, religion, or refined taste was to blame for the state of man in modern America. About a year ago I purchased a product called ClearTV. I don’t have cable or satellite and I don’t watch television, but every once in a while it is nice to get a network station for watching the State of the Union, or a football game, or whatever.
Today, I turned the television on and discovered something called Day Time Television. Day Time Television consists of Soap Operas – which appear to be televised theater exploring the depth and breadth of narcissism, solipsism, and the answer to the question, “What would relationships look like if everyone was stupid, narcissistic, and solipsistic?”. The action? We watch as soulless, purposeless characters, guided by unenlightened self-interest, react to the miseries and misfortunes of their own senseless corruption and emptiness, as they seem to struggle endlessly with one another. I suspect this struggle never, ever, ends.
There is something else on Day Time Television. Talk Shows. These talk shows appear to require four women and one gay man. The purpose? To take the most anti-intellectual positions in reference to the most inane news of the day, or worse, to take the most offensively ignorant positions in response to actually important news stories, depriving their audience of both context and factual data.
If these Soaps and these day time talk shows are any indication of what appeals to modern Americans, then I am convinced that we are already knee deep in a zombie apocalypse and as soon as I defeat my cancer and am restored to full health, I will prepare myself for the end times.
When I was a child there was an awesome movie called The Neverending Story. In it, a terrible Nothing was destroying all of Fantasia. Ladies and Gentlemen, America is being destroy by The Nothing and there is no defense against it.
I suggest panic. It seems the only reasonable response. I’m not talking white people suburban panic either. I’m talking about Japanese, Godzilla, people running down the middle of the street screaming, unable to stop themselves from looking back as they flee the monster kind of panic. In short, Day Time Television is the answer I’ve been looking for to explain the terrible cultural decline in America.